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#narcissist #narcissism #npd
<“Social Media – A Narcissistic Machine..”
“DON’T ARGUE With A Narcissist But DO THIS Instead To OUTSMART THEM | Lisa Romano”
“135.796 Aufrufe – 14.10.2020”
Lisa A. Romano
“but studies are proving that narcissism is on the rise. America itself is becoming very superficial
and there is a rise in reality tv show, there’s a rise in social media, um people are more than ever putting themselves out
there, there’s a lot of exhibitionism, a lot of superficiality, everybody wants to look perfect which is all feeding into
narcissism and there is definitely a cultural shift and if you haven’t read the book the narcissism epidemic, it’s quite
fascinating, because it talks about narcissism being on the rise and why and so we know that narcissism
is on the rise right there have been a number of studies done on college students specifically that
are showing an increase in narcissism. What does that mean for the rest of us?
What it means for the rest of us is that, especially if you’re someone who’s keeping your own narcissism in check,
because it is a personality trait and we’re all dealing with a narcissistic machine called social media…
social media has created or helped to create a very narcissistic paradigm and it’s seductive because social media
makes it possible for you to feel seen if you’re someone who’s never felt seen,
social media is a great way for you to feel seen, but narcissism is about taking, it’s about exploitation, it’s about discarding you and devaluing you….”

“You see it in the media with celebrities all the time, there are days and years perhaps that that the masses love one
celebrity, then all of a sudden they hate that celebrity, right?
And so it’s the same thing with social media you can be up one day and get lots of likes and all
of a sudden someone comes along some says something negative or exposes something about you and
all those likes disappear and then what happens your sense of self is is rocked because you’re not getting
that validation that you got from social media and so I think that it’s very smart for all of us to be very wise
about how we use social media and how social media has been designed to get us hooked, to love bomb us, to
seduce us, just like a narcissist and to maybe even gaslight us into staying hooked,
you know we all know that there are trolls that exist out there who dislike,
you just for the sake of disliking you they have nothing else better to do but
to say negative things about you and to harass you right and so what that does is it gaslights you.
We all know that smear campaigns happen all the time on facebook all the time on social media and it can
have a profound impact on someone’s sense of self, especially on younger people…”

“..and so you’re going to have to deal with learning how to outsmart and outplay a narcissist from time to time
you’re going to bump into a garden variety narcissist, there is no doubt that you will either work with a
narcissist, that you will be friends with the narcissist or someone who is high on the spectrum.
You will date a narcissist, marry a narcissist, there’s no doubt that you’re going to bump into someone,
that you need to learn how to protect yourself from and to develop some life skills around,
so that you can stay anchored in the self and not get sucked into the gears of a narcissistic
relationship, so a narcissist will love bomb you, a narcissist will idealize you to get what they want,
it is not about you, it’s always going to be about the narcissist, when it comes to social media,
algorithms are being created and what the algorithm does is, it love bombs you
it feeds you more of what you are looking at…”

“..that algorithm is taking all that information and feeding you more and more
and more of it, that’s why i think it’s important that we don’t rely on social
media for all the information we receive, because it’s biased.
Whatever you tend to pay attention to is what what the narcissistic machine
called social media is going to feed you and so you become polarized…
let’s say that you’ve identified someone in your experience that you think is
narcissistic ..there’s a lack of empathy, there’s indifference, there’s self-righteousness,
there’s arrogance, they’re condescending, they’re passive aggressive, they’re snide, they blame everybody, there’s a lack of accountability and this is a pattern with this person it doesn’t get better…”

“..is your nervous system thinking that something is off so when you’re thinking
about…we don’t realize that we have this internal gps that is always trying to
get us to stay in the right lane, but we don’t listen, we get red flags, we go oh,
no it can’t be true, you know why? Because they’ve activated our narcissism, there’s a narcissistic trait that has been activated in us oh I feel seen oh i feel special oh i feel important and we must manage that, because it’s like cocaine it’s like a drug especially if you are thirsty to feel seen, if you are someone who grew up in a home with narcissistic parents, if you’re struggling with abandonment trauma if you have been made to feel
like your feelings were irrelevant then yes when you bump into a narcissist
who makes you feel seen think of social media they see me look at pretty
butterflies all over my face and puppy ears i’m so cute i’m so adorable
everybody likes my picture, you feel seen and you want more of it it’s
normal and it’s natural it’s a natural human response,
we’re connecting or so we think but we have to be careful because it’s a
fantasy,. we don’t know these people on social media, we don’t know them, you don’t know the
person that thinks you’re you’re a cute little puppy,
you don’t know that person so we need to stay with our feet on the ground and be
realistic about how much energy we invest in the machine this narcissistic social
media machine,as well as with a narcissist.”

“..do i feel like something’s off with this person at work do i feel like
something’s off with this friend chances are it’s off it is so uncomfortable to be
friends with someone, especially if you’re friends with someone for a long time and you start to see things like oh i don’t like the way that feels right
and you can get all caught up in trying to swat the red flags…
is my internal gps telling me that something’s off, you need to listen to that so rather
than focus on what the narcissist is doing focus on how you feel,
how do i feel when i’m around this person, do i feel seen, do i feel heard? How do i feel about what she just said to that person or how do i feel about how that how he treated that person how do i feel about that comment how do i feel about the way
that i’ve just been shafted and i’ve just been they’ve just turned their back on me how do i feel about the way i feel like i’m being ostracized, have you ever been in a situation, where you’re with a bunch of friends and you feel like they’re icing you, but it’s done so
subtly that you can’t call them out on it and then if you call them out on it,
they turn it around on you and they make you look like you’re the crazy person,
so rather than call them out on it, focus on yourself, how does this make me feel..”

“you’re better off excusing yourself and getting out of there and just removing yourself from the negative energy than confronting a narcissist because they’re going to blame you,
they are so good at not caring how you feel, so ignore them, in other words like
walk away figure out how you feel and say adios, bye Felicia
and do what you have to do .. we get into trouble when we want to confront a narcissist,
when we want to fight with the narcissist it’s not going to work out,
because a narcissist lacks empathy, so the problem with a narcissist when you’re arguing with the narcissist that you have to keep in mind is that they are not as moral as the average person who doesn’t have narcissism, in order to be moral it’s assumed and
presumed that part of why you’re moral is because you have this do unto other thing as you
would have others do unto you, you have empathy… someone yawns and you yawn, that’s an
empathy neuron, because you can relate to this person that helps us bond as human beings and not destroy one another you ever notice that when there’s a car accident
people one second were walking around on planet earth like they didn’t know
anybody not a care in the world, boom, there’s an accident happening and
people come out of the buildings they stop what they’re doing they stop their cars
they run towards the fire they’re dragging people out, it’s amazing it’s absolutely
amazing a narcissist is like what are you doing why are you stopping the car
go around them we’ve got our nails to get done…but someone that doesn’t have
narcissism, a kind person who has compassion is stopping that car, even just to call 9-1-1 to make sure everyone’s okay..”

“..if i refuse to do that the boat’s gonna sink i’ll have nothing
i’ll have nothing so i would rather identify where’s the hole in the boat so that i
can make a logical decision about whether or not i want to be with
this person so ask yourself are the tires flat in your relationship
and if so ask yourself why have you totaled your car talking about enmeshment
think about two cars that collide and they’re both now part of one car where
you can’t even see where the other car ends and the other car begins you can’t
see the edges anymore that’s what happens with a narcissistic relationship,
narcissists are empty holes and you can’t have a relationship
with a narcissist, relationships are fair, relationships grow, relationships bend
and they weave… narcissistic relationships are strict, it’s a
narcissist way or it’s no way, if you’re not gonna run around like a
co-dependent people-pleasing saying yes anticipating the needs of the
narcissist fanning them when it gets too hot, wiping their brow oh yes telling them
how beautiful they are, if you’re not going to do that the
relationship’s not going to work to be in a relationship with the
narcissist you can’t you can’t confront them, you can’t expect them to show up and be
fair to, you you can’t, because the minute you do that they become really aggressive and depending on what level of narcissism we’re dealing with will determine
their behavior, they can become super super aggressive, super super punitive, vindictive or they completely discard you, you never hear from them again, they ghost you until they need another source of narcissistic supply…”

“Greg Wallace
vor 10 Monaten
Our culture is a narcissist..we were born into a planned, narcissistic matrix that we’re finally waking up from. That’s why these channels are becoming more and more popular!”

“Andrew George
vor 10 Monaten
They don’t care. The hardest part is accepting a parent wants you to be a loser/unsuccessful/minimum confidence because they are in competition. And any success or any good characteristic that you have will be a threat to them.
Rad Fish
vor 4 Monaten
Sorry messed up parents.
Jelena
vor 10 Monaten (bearbeitet)
Sadly, but…YES
Good luck on that
We can do it 😊
Day Hill
vor 2 Monaten
You are worthy and lovable. ❤️
myroad
vor 9 Monaten
Narcissists never take responsibilities for all harm…and they convince people that they are very good persons and they blame them’s victims instead, this is the most evil and cruel thing from everything what they do that is not enough for them just to harm others but plus that they blame the victims for all evil they did and they play to be holy ! Sad thing is that many people believe them and justify all evil the do to the victims !
Leon Sandoval
vor 10 Monaten
“I’m so misunderstood” was what I dealt with for 20 years….
Star Borne
vor 10 Monaten
There’s a great documentary called The Social Dilemma that affirms exactly what she’s saying about social media influence.
Kelly K
vor 8 Monaten
So perfectly articulated on every single point.”